The Wedding Planner and Other Rantings…

So, it’s official. We’ve got our date. We’ve got our theme. We’ve got our guests. And we’ve got a problem!

We know waaay too many people. Seriously. And our wedding can only host 75 folks. In that, we’ve had to be really selective in the people that we’ve invited. It hasn’t come without the pulling of teeth, but we’ve finally got our list kind of narrowed down and we’ve even got a starting budget (which must be cut in half).

What I do know for certain about my wedding is that I’m truly feeling connected to my partner and I’m excited that we’ve made the decision to take the leap. May 14, 2011 is going to be one in a long line of incredibly happy days in my life. I’m soooo glad I said, “Yes”.

Robert Anthony Kotaran has proven to be the man of my dreams!

On Avatar: The Last Airbender

Read Ty’s blog here:

In a word: Terrible.

That’s all I have to say about that.

Other Rantings

My grandmother had a small surgery this past week and it sent my nerves spiraling. A few years back, I buried my great grandmother on my birthday so having my grandma hospitalized on my 34th brithday week left a bad taste in my mouth. Needless to say, she has pulled through the surgery nicely and will probably be released in a few days. Thank the Creator.

However, during this time, I got a chance to really see how my family pulls together in distress. Most of my family was thrilled about Grandma’s good fortune and pending recovery, but there is always one person who can really fuck up the vibe for everyone. Without naming names, I just encourage folks to really CHOOSE happiness. CHOOSE prosperity. CHOOSE wellness. CHOOSE to not let your worry and concern come off as a campaign for bravery.

One thing I hate, is when people use their emotional issues, egos, and hang-ups to deflect the issues at hand. My grandmother is sick, everyone in the family was worried, communication was given to THE ENTIRE FAMILY exactly the same way every single time we heard from a doctor. One isolated relative thought that we were concealing info/not giving enough info/weren’t competent in our delivery of information because in the past, they have withheld and been secretive with info in dire circumstances. Everyone doesn’t roll like you. You suspected foul play and lies because some of that is embedded inside of you. You suspected that folks were withholding info, because that’s what you do. Perhaps, it’s time to stop projecting your issues on to others, heal the issues within yourself and take a stab at being a little more pleasant and little more agreeable.

Haughty attitudes, nasty demeanors, divisiveness – NONE of that equates or even comes off as valiance. Try again. Those behaviors are repellants. It behooves you to consider if you want to draw closer to those that really want to relate to you, love you, and be cool with you; or if you believe you’re better off in the world alone.

No matter what, remember that YOU always have a choice. Also remember, that everyone else also has the choice to decide if your negative attitudes are worth dealing with.

On My 34th Birthday

So, on Friday I turn 34 and I couldn’t be more excited. Cassie and Nisha are taking me out to their favorite restaurant, my stepdaughter is falling though, I’ll get to spend some time with Ty and my family so I’m pretty stoked.

What I’ve learned in this year is that it’s never too late to see your dreams fulfilled. It’s never too late for the Creator to quicken those goals that have been shelved so that you can run with them and bring them into fruition. I never thought I would get over James and the madness that was our relationship – I did (and am still repairing every day). I never thought a balanced, sacred, wholesome love would find me – it did. I never thought I’d be working my dream job while enriching the lives of other – I am. I never thought that I would find so much joy in the creative process of writing music again with such an incredible team – I am. None of this was what I planned.

Thank the Creator that he is the best of planners. 2010 is NOT over yet.


Yo’ Girl,


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